Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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