she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
