they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
