You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
