He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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