Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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