We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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