I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
