Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
please come you make the beer taste better
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
