sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
