I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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