he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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