just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize