Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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