no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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