Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
