super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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