its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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