im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
