So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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