I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
