I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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