and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
