trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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