i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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