Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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