so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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