he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Quick, to the slutcave!
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Randomize
