She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
