There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
