brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
My vagina just clenched in fear
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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