ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Randomize
