i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
