love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I will pee on everything he values.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
