i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize