hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
When did angry sex become our thing?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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