The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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