***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
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