she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize