google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
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