we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
