I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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