omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
she told me i tasted like america
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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