i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
