Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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