i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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