i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I need a beard to bite.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
