How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
