Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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