Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize
