Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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