Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
